I'm drinking a decaf cappuccino at Brewed Cafe. Today has been one of those days that reminds me that someone with my central nervous system has no business drinking regular coffee, much less blogging about it! Every six weeks, I have Merry Maids clean my apartment, and today they arrived about fifteen minutes before I was ready for them. Fortunately, the fire alarm went off, which bought me five minutes--that happens so often in my building that I just put in earplugs and ignore it. Then, about 4 p.m., I happened to pull out my iPhone: "Pretty nasty blog about you, no idea who started it" read the Twitter DM, "pushed" to my phone's main interface. It then provided a gibberish-y Twitter link, which had been disabled. I try to stay focused at work, especially as I start fading in the late afternoon, but of course this unleashed a few moments of panic. It took even fewer for me to realize that this was most likely an instance of someone's Twitter account being hacked.
Just last night, I blogged: "If we allow them to drive a wedge into our identity, that is harmful." And boy, did I get a wedgie this afternoon. Which makes me wonder: Why? For the past month, I've been writing blog entries that are mostly unflattering towards myself, along with several posts that might lead one to believe that I'm aspiring to be a low-rent version of someone who hosts those PBS specials they show during fundraising drives. (Because, you know, I am--there would seem to be worse hobbies, after all.) Any infuriation I've earned with this blog is likely to have been years ago. It's dismaying that on some level, all of this self-improvement isn't registering with my central nervous system, which seems to be occasionally living in some parallel universe. It'd been a good while since I had anything so far in the direction of the full monty--and if you don't know what I mean, I hope you never do.
Of course, there's a chance there might indeed be a "pretty nasty blog about" me. If not now, maybe someday. I hope not, but if there is, I will pull myself through it somehow. I hope that someday soon, I can bring myself to a point where I wouldn't lose a minute's sleep over it.