East Side/Riverwest: Snapshots: Columbia Hospital

I work very close to Columbia Hospital, so I often walk over there around lunchtime to buy something from the vending machines or, occasionally, from the cafe.  In an entirely non-racist sense, I can say that Columbia is the most ghettoest place I've been since I moved out of, well, the ghetto.  (OK, the Apu Mart on the corner of Humboldt and North is a little more ghettoest).  "Ghetto" means, to me, the steadfast refusal to invest one cent in maintenance, upkeep, or other capital improvements, preferring to divert every last cent to profit.  In our free-market system, there are really only two sanctions for this behavior.  One is the law--which doesn't always work very effectively.  The offenses of slum landlords really have to climb to almost unbelievable proportions (like, literally sh*t pouring on people) before the slow-moving arm of the law is roused into action.

The other sanction is social opprobrium--indeed, outrage.  I really think this is long due for a comeback.  This is a relatively trivial thing, but I've often had trouble with malfunctioning vending machines at Columbia.  Today, I literally had just put in my 65 cents for a carton of milk when the machine lost power and conked out.  Admittedly, I thought that was hilarious.  Still, in light of the parent organization's decision to close Columbia Hospital, I wonder if they are just letting the place slowly die.  I take exception to that approach.

I must disclose that one year ago, I went to Columbia for an actual medical procedure:  I had an ultrasound of my abdomen taken to see whether my kidneys show signs of Polycystic Kidney Disease, which I have a 50% chance of developing.  My care was as professional as I could have asked for.  Still, it's hard not to extrapolate from a lack of attention to the little things.

Comments

[Suzanne]

Well, Mike, I think I need to take you on a field trip to the real ghetto! FWIW, hospitals contract out their food and vending services, and other services, and in my experience it is sometimes difficult to get them to hold up their end of the contract. Case in point: the building in which I currently work, which is on long-term lease by CSM (Columbia's parent company) is not routinely maintained by the owner, despite this being in the contract. Garbage collected on the sidewalk over the winter and was not removed, including a needleless Christmas tree (still there in March) and a disemboweled microwave oven, as well as All Kinds of Trash; complaints went unheeded. Finally I went out with my digital camera and got some telling shots, which my manager then forwarded to the building's owners. Suddenly, there were results. (This was not "pick it up on the way to lunch" trash. This was pressure hose and a push broom trash.) So I know it can be difficult and does not necessarily reflect on the hospital at all.
It is very sad to me that CH is closing. It has a long and proud history. I've mentioned a bit of it on my own blog- maybe I should put up more.

[Michael Miller]

Would that owner be Pick 'n' Save? I forgot about *that* place. It's definitely much more ghettoest than either of the two places I spoke of previously.

And I'm always up for a field trip =)